Those Sick Canadians
(?) August 31st, 1999

According to the residents of Espanola, Ontario, US Military aircraft are flying overhead and dropping strange chemicals.  This is bad enough, but wouldn't you know it...these chemicals are making people sick!

Some pertinent excerpts from the CBC:

Shelly Jordan thinks strange planes might be making her kids
sick. "I was concerned to see if this had anything to do with it,
because I've heard of other things that are going on with children...."


...many in the community have reported respiratory problems and strange aches and pains. 


Town council heard that some believe military jets are
dropping material over the town as part of a weather experiment.

We're not done yet:

It isn't just a couple of people who think that. More than two
200 have signed a petition. Ben McNenly has seen the planes
and he thinks they're American KC-135s. 

About two hundred or so years ago, pretty much the same stuff was happening in towns all across eastern Europe.  Except instead of calling Parliament members and signing petitions, they exhumed corpses and drove pointy sticks through various parts of the dead person's anatomy.  

The cases above share a lot of the same variables; people (especially children) getting sick, seemingly unexplainable vectors of contagion, and the ultimate responsibility for the epidemic being placed on some kind of ethereal ubervillain, for which any amount of proof is mysteriously nonexistent.  Two hundred years ago, this villain was the vampire.  Today it's (Pick One) a) aliens, b) conspiracies c) both. 

I guess we can get one solid lesson out of this:  even Canadians are susceptible to kookiness.  That could come as a surprise to no one. 



June 11th, 2001

A Million Damn Dollars
May 31st, 2001

Government Stooges
May 13th, 2001